What do I wish people knwe me?

Here is a video of a short part of my life, I would like people to know about me.

 

The surrounding where a human being grows up help to define the personality. Most of the time people do not realize where I come from. They know I am Honduras, and typically the first thought is a violent and dangerous country. The truth is there are some amazing and peaceful places still in Honduras, and I am blessed to come from a small town where everybody knows everybody, and we all take care of each other. I can truly say that I fall in love with my town. Therefore I am used to a safety environment, with many people around me that I can call them friends.

Family is where you learn the first life lessons and role models to follow. I grew up in a conservative family, in addition to the fact we live in a small conservative town. My family rules are based on moral values, and being honorable at all times. Moreover my mom and I, we are Baptist, again one characteristic of Baptists is how conservative they are, couple with praise the Lord all the times. All of these components defined the way I think about many controversial topics, when the time comes to express the points of view people do not realize all the factors that make me to think in a specific way. Overall I consider myself as an open mind person, which has not fear about the future.

My childhood was not easy at all. Because of many factors I was forced to learn how to be independent. Also to give my best, because my only competition is myself to become better and better every day. Consequently I was forced to look for the best as a reward of my effort. I had to learn how to balance my time among, parties, events, sleep which my favorite thing to do and my homework. There was nobody telling me what I should do, so I did what I thought was the best for my studies in my personal life. Loyalty is essential for me, so even though all the craziness of being a teenager, I had to learn how to be loyal to myself even if that was a disagreement for others.

The main question is how all of this connects? I didn’t know how important all of these were until I left home a few months ago. I still remember the day I had to stay myself without the bubble I used to live in. The day when I had to become a responsible adult and do everything by own because the people that loves is miles away from me. Every day is a constant battle to keep loyal to myself, to still follow the conservative rules of my family, to keep the same traditions of my lovely town. All of these creates a battle field in my mind at all times. I have to struggle to take decisions and think carefully if I am not losing myself and turn into a different person. I want to learn about different cultures and experience new things, but I don’t want to lose the true representation of who I am. I want to still look at the mirror and still see reflected the girl I know.

This is what I want people to know when they see me, all the background that made me who I am, and battle of the transition I am living now. I want them to know I live by faith, because if I live by reason I wouldn’t be here. I want them to know that I have not fear about the future, because I know I can build and design my own future. My story is based on what I am living now, my daily struggles and my forever homesick. My remainder to keep going every day is the bible verse Isiah 43:13, which says For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I will help you.”